I Deleted Instagram Again
Soul Letter #28
Hello👋 folks, Shubham here.
I am back with another edition of Soul Letter 🗞
Due to on-off pandemic restrictions, online presence is the only way to meet anyone new nowadays. It’s the best rational justification my mind could come up with while downloading Instagram.
After spending the last two years ridiculing social media, I ended up on one of them. Ironically my first article on Medium was hinged around why one should quit social media. I wrote it back in 2018 when I deleted all social media accounts.
I truly believed this time I’ll tame the devil (how naive). I have read all the dirty tricks these apps use to keep users hooked 24/7.
I had a well-planned strategy with proper cut-off timings to keep the usage in check.
It soon turned into an arduous task, much resilient than I expected. My experiment lasted for two months before I threw in the towel.
So what happened? Hear me out.
I Was Always Looking for the Perfect Moment
One crucial promise I made to myself while making my online comeback was not to share photos from my daily life. People become obsessed trying to catch the picture-perfect moments rather than enjoying them.
However, I started clicking photos during my daily commute that I found funny. If any noticeable thing occurred within my vicinity range, it ended up as my Instagram story in an instant.
I started craving funky moments to share on Instagram.
I Began Doing Things To Exhibit Them on Instagram
I keep myself busy with reading books, writing articles, watching intriguing videos on YouTube, exercising, playing badminton, and so on.
Eventually, I started posting daily stories about my sassy activities. It felt good to flaunt my healthy lifestyle.
Things were going fine until I realized I wasn’t doing them for myself anymore. It became a way to boast on Instagram.
While reading books, I was evaluating the best quote to share to appear erudite.
Lame isn’t it, I know!
Instagram Has Changed a Lot
In 2018, I deleted Instagram sensing it wasn’t the ideal solution. I accepted I was the problem. The app was built with a noble intention to help people stay connected by sharing photos. It was me who couldn’t use it in moderation.
This time I felt the app was being run with malicious intentions.
I follow a handful of pages to avoid being overwhelmed. Still, the Instagram algorithm kept updating my feed with posts from suggested pages.
In a way, scrolling became a never-ending process.
Similarly, there is a feature that auto-plays video. I despise it. I am able enough to play a video if I want to.
All these cheap strategies are employed to keep us hooked on these apps.
Now while deleting my account, I was content because I am not the only problem anymore.
No Meaningful ROI
I assumed by joining Instagram I will stay in touch with a lot of amazing people.
With time I realized I was talking to the same four-five friends with whom I chatted before.
Moreover, my chats were swamped only with memes. All I did was search for new memes to reply to the old ones.
Overall, Instagram had a poor ROI. It added almost zero value to my life.
I Started Having Second Thoughts About My Posts
I never thought this would happen to me. I am usually secure with the things I post or write.
Gradually I started having second thoughts about my posts. Maybe I could have used a different filter, or I should have used a different font style.
These thoughts flooded my mind as soon as I posted something.
Rather than being delighted with the memory I was sharing, I was more concerned about how others would perceive it.
The Pressure To Look Funny
I am a witty person who likes to joke around. I love to make others smile. People suggest I should try stand-up comedy.
During my initial days on Instagram, I shared some humorous memes, insights, did interesting Q&A. People loved it.
I was grateful for all the attention I was getting.
Suddenly I started feeling the pressure. Every day I was keenly looking for elusive funny things from our daily life to write.
Eventually, the pressure took its toll.
I Became the Person I Despised
The final nail in the coffin was when a friend of mine said he envied me for living such an incredible life. He felt his life was bland in front of mine.
Be mindful the social media shows only the best curated moments of our lives. Judging by it we assume how well people are doing in life.
What is the worst thing about social media?
For me, it is watching celebrities showing off their flawless bodies, magnificent houses, luxurious cars, dream vacations, and all that.
It’s easy to feel worthless in comparison to them.
I never want my content to make someone else feel the same way.
Sharing the books I have read, blog posts, funny insights made others assume I have got it all figured out. I am living an ideal life.
I became the person I hated.
Final Thoughts
The last two months provided a reality check. I learned a lot about myself, my principles, and my beliefs.
Everything has positive and negative aspects. If the overall impact is worthwhile, one should stick with it.
Anything that affects your peace is too costly to pursue.
In my case, Instagram had limited little positive influence. It adversely affected my mental peace. I tried several techniques to use it prudently but failed miserably. At last, deletion was my final resort.
Hope you enjoyed today’s edition.
Signing off for today :) Until next time, Houdoe! 🙋♂️