Random Musings 😏, Part-29
Soul Letter #81
Hello👋 folks, Shubham here.
I am back with another edition of Random Musings.
2025: What's the Goal?
Great to see you again. Honestly, 2024 was rough—like, seriously rough.
With my marriage (yes, a love marriage) falling apart, disruptions at work (we’re still dealing with the fallout of deleted data), and a series of other minor inconveniences, it’s been tough sailing. For months, it’s felt like a constant struggle just to make it to the next day.
I haven’t written much because, well, I haven’t been doing much. And if I’m not doing, there’s no point in preaching.
That said, things are starting to look a bit more positive now. While I’m still working through the lingering bitterness from the marriage fiasco, it’s a work in progress.
I’m sure many others also had a tough 2024 and are hoping to make 2025 better. That’s the plan—Doing One Better.
Life’s mishaps often tempt you to lean into negativity, to let your toxic side take over. But you choose how to respond.
It reminds me of the story of the two wolves, An elder tells a child about the battle inside us between two wolves, one representing negativity and the other positivity. When the child asks which wolf wins, the elder replies, “The one you feed.”
It’s easy to fall into negativity, but we fight to keep doing the right thing. Often, these inner battles go unnoticed—no applause, no recognition. But we fight anyway, not for validation but because it’s the right thing to do.
Another focus for 2025 is —Doing Things for Yourself.
One of my favorite bloggers Sean Kernan talks about to be good at things silently. Go to the gym, not to show off on Instagram. Learn an instrument, not to impress anyone. Let your skills speak for themselves and surprise people when they stumble upon them unexpectedly (like a rare starfish or a gem whichever suits you).
So far, in just three weeks of January, I’ve taken small but meaningful steps. I’ve started writing again. I’ve begun doing home workouts to get in better shape. I’ve even read my first book of the year. I went to a stand-up show and a movie alone.
It’s all about building momentum, laying the groundwork to reach the version of myself I want to be. Here’s to a better year ahead.
Grateful for Our Local Book Club
Ever since I started reading books, I longed to be part of a book club. However, after moving back to my hometown, Kanpur, I felt it was almost impossible, as a tier-2 city like mine was unlikely to have one.
To my surprise, there was an active book club, but they had a screening process. After a telephonic interview, they rejected me without giving any reason. It felt absurd. Sure, they might have their standards, but in my opinion, reading a book should be enough to qualify as a book club member.
Eventually, I decided to start my own. Fortunately, I managed to poach a few readers from a local book fair. Word of mouth spread, and soon we became primarily a WhatsApp group.
In the beginning, there was some friction. We experimented with online group activities, but they didn’t work well, and many people left the group. It was disheartening.
As someone who tries to accept things as they are rather than expecting how they should be, I reminded myself that you can put in your best effort but still have no control over the outcome.
Although many people left, a handful stuck around, keeping the group alive. Thanks to our Instagram page, we also connected with a few like-minded souls.
After months without any ground presence, this year we’re making a real effort to turn things around. We hosted two silent reading sessions and started a buddy read where everyone reads the same book, helping members develop a consistent reading habit.
Recently, we even created a subgroup focused on exercise, where members share their workouts to motivate each other to stay healthy.
Currently, we’re a lovely small community of around 20-30 people, including professors, teachers, entrepreneurs, students, painters, and more. Apart from books, we discuss philosophy, movies, art, mythology, and a range of other topics.
A few years ago, I would’ve been thrilled just to be part of a book club where I could discuss books. Watching other book club admins, I doubted if I was even qualified to run one. From getting rejected to starting the club, witnessing its initial excitement fade, and now seeing its revival, it’s been an incredible journey.
This experience has taught me that you’ll eventually find your tribe if you stay true to yourself.
Keep doing the eccentric things that make you—you.
PS: A huge shoutout to Payas for his never-ending amiability, which has been instrumental in our resurgence.
IG Addiction
I don’t have a personal Instagram account, but I do manage two business(@runjhun_printers, @print_potter) accounts and one for our book club (@bookclubkanpur). This means I spend a significant amount of time on the platform.
Lately, I’ve found myself being far less productive and increasingly using Instagram as a way to stay distracted and avoid tackling the important stuff.
As I’m working on getting back on track, I’ve realized just how hooked I’ve become.
Mornings used to be phone-free until after I’d completed my workout. Now, the first thing I do upon waking is grab my phone and open WhatsApp. Inevitably, when the dopamine hit from that isn’t enough, I turn to Instagram. If there aren’t many messages waiting for me there, I end up mindlessly scrolling through reels.
For a few days, I experimented with greyscale mode to make my device less appealing. However, I couldn’t stick with it. Whenever I needed to view work-related color designs or something similar, I’d disable greyscale and then forget to turn it back on.
Now, I’ve started uninstalling the app after posting and only downloading it again when I need to use it. This hasn’t completely overcome my addiction, but it’s the best solution I’ve found so far.
There are a few other methods I’m experimenting with, and if they prove successful, I’ll share them soon.
The urge to be bombarded with likes and messages is surreal. I’ve caught myself downloading the Instagram app first thing in the morning just to get that “dose,” which is honestly scary.
I thought of myself as a cut above the rest, but no, I am just another digital druggy.
Hopefully once I build my routine around healthier habits, this craving should naturally decrease.
Wish me luck and if you have any hacks do comment them below.
Hope you enjoyed this edition.
Signing off for today :) Until next time, Houdoe! 🙋♂️